When the nest empties

I’ve never been one of those parents who thought I was “super”. I do, however, believe that I did the best that I knew how. In the end, I am very proud of the young human that will embark on her new life beginnings in approximately a week and a half.

As a little girl, I always wanted ONE male child and that was solely because my mother had 4 girls so I wanted something I had not experienced. As I got older, I realized that if I had a son – he wouldn’t be good for NO woman because I would’ve spoiled him so – therefore I was VERY glad when India came along.

India was conceived on my honeymoon and as “fairy tale” as that sounds – it also meant that I was going straight from being a new wife to a new mother in less than a year. I was terrified. My pregnancy was a difficult one. My body tried to abort her and every ailment a pregnant woman could experience I had. I spent 5 of my 9 months on bed rest. I could not STAND the smell of my own home so stayed nauseous and had to take meds in order to be able to eat & keep foods down. I suffered with excessive saliva so I spit CONSTANTLY – At about 5 months, my tests were not coming out very well so my OBGYN requested that I have an amniocentesis because my numbers were really high for having a baby with birth and/or mental defects. As myself, my husband and my sister sat in the office of the hospital prepared to undergo this very traumatic procedure – the doctor asked us this question: Would you change anything IF this baby was born with special needs? When we answered no – he then said – go home – I do not advise that you do this procedure with your high risk tendencies. WOW – I thought but that wasn’t all. Although I did not begin to show until my 7th month – I struggled with extreme acne and my neck turned so black – I thought I’d never get my body back again. With all of this going on, the Tuesday before my due date (which was approaching on the forth coming Saturday) on our way to my last doctor’s appointment we were in a car accident. At this point, because my blood pressure had shot up along with all the other issues my doctor decided to induce labor. SO – I had to immediately go and check into the hospital where they had to give me magnesium (because my blood pressure had shot up) then Pitocin to speed up the birthing process. Needless to say, this experience was a MESS!!! At one point, my baby had become under distress so they were threatening to do a C-section. (My desire had always been to do natural birth so I saw that experience going out the window quickly and those birthing classes had been useless). Finally after my Mom & Hubby prayed, I had dilated to my OBGYN’s liking and it was time to bring this baby into the world. India Artrice Standley (named after her paternal grandmother) was born on April 14, 2000 at 3:00 PM at 6 lbs. When she came into this world she entered with the highest pitch squeal even the nurses were baffled LOL (my soprano).

Since her arrival, this child has managed to unite 3 families. She is her Daddy’s youngest and ONLY girl – she is the pride of her 2 brothers (from hubby first marriage) as well as becoming my Mom’s second youngest grand. She is definitely her Granny’s baby ONLY be cause they are so much a like. She loves intensely, she cares until it hurts, she loves to laugh, create, draw and learn. I’ve never had a day’s struggle with this child here on earth. She has been the IDEAL child to raise. I poured into her until I am on empty.

As she embarks on her first year away from home, I have so many mixed feelings. I am already missing those formative years but I trust that God got her. She has her own mind and know who she belongs to. India has made motherhood for me very easy. I cherish what was and look forward to what will be. She’s my baby and will always be but I release her. I release her to the God who ensured she’d get here because she has purpose and impact within her. I release her to shine and be the beautiful being that she’s been called to be. I release my baby to share with the world all the unique & beauty of LOVE birthed through struggle.

We have a week and a half until she’s off to college. Both she & I have had bouts with anxiety BUT we understand that this is the process of life and no matter what….LIFE is precious and we will live it to its fullest. So, although my nest will be empty – it will be FULL of impact that India will have on this world. Thank you GOD – for our gift ~ Miss India

Original Article

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